Permission Granted

I recently found this photograph of me taken in 2008, when I published my first book, Secrets of My Sex, a poetry collection. In the background, you can see the photo I used for my book cover, a snapshot taken after a flamenco show in Spain circa 1982. After the dancers and audience cleared, my girlfriend and I commandeered the stage for an impromptu photo shoot.

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​The words “Permission Granted” entered my mind when I saw this image. We discussed this subject in my Write Where You Are writing circles this week. To write, we must give ourselves permission to say things that we were taught not to say. Most of us learned self-censorship at an early age. There were things you could and couldn’t say. Spoken and unspoken rules. Polite society. 
 
But as writers, we peel back layers of self-censorship in service to art, healing, and authentic self-expression. This process requires courage and compassion. Like most things, you get better at it with practice. It’s just as crucial for a writer to learn how to lean into their truth as it is for them to study the mechanics, or craft, of writing. 
 
I was forty-eight years old in this photograph, and I needed so much permission!
 
• Permission to listen to the small voice within.
• Permission to write my truth.
• Permission to believe in my writing dreams in the face of rejection.
• Permission to write about sex, which, at that time, was totally taboo.
• Permission to be honest.
• Permission to be bold.
• Permission to call attention to myself, which I grew up believing was unsavory at best and evil at worst.
• Permission to pay a photographer for a photo shoot when money was tight—but wow, it was fun! 
• Permission to be naked figuratively through my poems and literally at this photo shoot.
• Permission to be heard.
• Permission to risk public humiliation and failure.
• Permission to stop hiding.
• Permission to be vulnerable.
• Permission to follow my heart’s desire to open my own business as a writing teacher and coach despite “Who do you think you are?” thinking.
 
I could go on and on.
 
I’m still giving myself permission. It’s not something you do, and you’re done. Permission is a process and ongoing practice.
 
Whatever you want to do or write, do it now. The only person who counts who can give you permission is you.
 
Try bestowing “Permission Granted” on your creative dreams and see what happens.
 
What do you need permission to do? I’d love to hear from you.